Clearing and cleaning

 We have managed to fill a whole skip! Now with a 3 bed bungalow to clear, plus a garage and a shed that might not sound like too big a feat but since a huge amount of it went to "Metal Mickey" the metal scrap man, I can assure you in the end it probably was. Most of the stuff mum had left or aquired since dad passed really was rubbish, I dont mean just stuff I didnt want or that was too old fashioned to be of use, but mainly things that were chipped, broken, missing a part or covered in rust, mould or spiders webs. Dont get me wrong. There was still a bit of stuff that I have decided to keep, but not much for two lifetimes.

There was also several bits I thought aught to be there that were just plain missing - the glass rabbit shapped jelly mould that had graced many a childhood birthday party table has completely vanished (despite mum making a fuss about it returning to her home when I borrowed it a few years back). What has become of grandads slate based shove halfpenny board (that I know was there 2 years ago when we cleaned out the shed)? And why in the attic is there a box of expensive looking lenses and parts that obviously fitted on dads telescope - but no sign of the actual telescope?

Wayne came over with his dads car and trailer to take the three sets of ladders, 4 plastic chairs and an assortment of tools over to the site, transporting a very heavy concrete wishing well back to ours on the way. He also helped move the repro old fashioned very ugly and very large cabinette out so Martin could finish the job of breaking it up (yes it was held together with a hope and a prayer) and lift it onto the skip too. We still have a3 seater settee behind the garage to get rid of but we run out of room and inclination. We are hoping that once we have sold the place the rest of the furniture can go to charity. 

Our next task is cleaning, so thursday we started on the conservatory. The carpet had a track of solid mud running from the door to the lounge where the dog had been given free range to the garden while mum was bedridden, with no one to wipe off his paws. I honestly thought we would have to resort to mats to disguise this, but the rug doctor we had persuaded mum to invest in two years ago has come into its own and now you cant see a single mark. The carpet looks as good as new, and definately smells much better since I have wiped all the window frames and the furniture with a mixture of bleach and flash! There were a deal of very dirty bowls of water to get it that far though.

On Friday we tackled the lounge which wasnt in a much better state than the conservatory. I took the huge patio door curtains down, bought them home and washed them. Now they are hanging in our bedroom as they fit much better than the ones we have, and leave the lounge in the bungalow much lighter and brighter. 

Tomorrow we intend swapping out the conservatory furniture for the dinning room table so that we can dress the dining room as a double bedroom when we market the place.

Talking of marketing the cheeky estate agent Kristy phoned to say she had a couple that wanted a bungalow but she had literally none to show them and would we sanction a one off veiwing. At first I was going to agree but then I started to think that if this couple wanted it, but we had not agreed to sell through this estate agent where would we stand, and we hadnt discussed fees or prices to say nothing of how long probate might take. And if we went with a different estate agent where would we stand if that particular couple still put in an offer? We turned down the veiwing.

The law firm holding mums original will held us up for a week getting it out of the archives but they finally handed it over on thursday so Friday hopefully Sue our friendly probate agent will get the ball rolling.

The building society have also caused some stress, as having told them we wanted to open a seperate account for all mums estate monies, so could we have a cheque from all her closing acounts, they sent us a cheque and then told us we couldnt open an account in branch because of Covid rules!!! I was dumstruck but we have had to come home, apply on line and once approved have to return to the branch to put the cheque in. Madness!

Goodbye my mummy

 On 4th December my mum finally passed away after a three month fight with heart disease. It has not been an easy fight for any of us, especially as her wish was to spend her last days at home with her beloved dog, and her portal to keep herself in touch with her family and friends. With some tremendous help from both the NHS and Pilgrims Hospice we got through.

On Friday, having got Christmas out of the way, we gathered friends and family together to send her on her final journey. The service was held at Margate Crem, officiated by the wonderful Ashleigh. who gave a beautiful send off and farewell to my mum. There was a good turn out from family and friends and I was especially touched to see my Auntie Jean who suffers severely from Parkinsons arrive with her sister to help her in her wheel chair. 

At the start of December the Omicron version of Corona virus was increasing at a very fast rate so when Martin and I started the arrangements for the wake we were nervous of both the risk of the virus to our guests and ourselves by booking an inside venue, and also the problems that could arise if we arranged a pub "do" only to find ourselves back in lockdown or further restrictions. Jokingly while on messenger to Laura I had quipped we would be having KFC on the beach at this rate. Not KFC, fish n chips she replied, which immediately switched on a light bulb! Why not? Both my mum and dad had regularly (and I mean at least 3 times a month in the summer) taken trips to Deal to sit on the beach munching their fish supper (at lunch time), and there was nothing mum enjoyed more than fish and chips that someone else had cooked instead of her. 

So on a crisp winter morning Martin and I drove a test run from the crem to Deal, parked up and went in search of the chippie they always used. Imagine our surprise and disappointment to discover the chip shop shut and a notice of opening times informing us they no longer opened for lunches. It had seemed such a good idea. We came home very despondent. Unbeknown to me though, Martin phoned the manageress and spoke to her, but she said she would have to get back to him as to if they would open specially. He thought he had done a good thing but I was very displeased. Firstly because he had not told me, and secondly because making any kind of fuss of this kind was not my mum's way. He apologized and politely told the manageress we had changed our minds.

However we couldn't get the idea of fish and chips on the beach out of our minds, and so after a couple more days we approached the Sunset Cafe on our own sea front. Hats off to Sam the manageress there, she couldnt have been more helpful or kind. She was willing to put on extra staff, clean off all their table and chairs that had been shut up for the winter, put the tab on our card for the bar, and charge us takeaway prices as it was cheaper even though we would be getting table service.
Everyone we invited thought it was a terrific idea, and even though it was freezing cold, they all refused to go inside the café because sitting outside would have been 'what my mum would have done'. To be honest I think she would have sat in the car with the heating on, but I was so overwhelmed that everyone toughed it out for the lady. 

So on Friday 7th January  2022, one day before her 86 birthday, we sat on Herne Bay sea front, twenty two of her friends,  neighbours, nephews, nieces  and appropriate spouses sat and enjoying beautifully cooked and served cod and chips in paper in the freezing cold, celebrating the life of both my mum and dad.

Oh and I do have to mention Jane and Neil who, unable to get back from Spain due to the pandemic, watched the live link via Wi-Fi and then found somewhere in Spain selling take away fish and chips, a sandy beach to eat them on (all be it in their shorts and tee shirts as appose to the rest of us wrapped in hats gloves and car blankets) and raised a glass of sherry to my mum!

RIP Pamela Joan.

Can I keep this up?

 I am finding it a bit of a struggle keeping up with my bullet journal mainly because senior moments cause me to forget I am doing it! I am determinded to continue though and have just spent half an hour getting next weeks pages prepped.

So far this week has been quite busy. Those death announcements took us the best part of a morning to hand deliver even though it was bank holiday. It also turns out that even though mum left a will because there is property involved we will also need probate. Martin took a look at the gov website and then decided to hand it all over to a profesional,

The first step apparently is to get three valuations from estate agents so yesterday was taken up waiting for them to arrive and look over the place. Laura (a dab hand at selling properties) gave predictions on the valuations from each agent and although the prices came in at nearly 60,000 adrift she was actually more or less spot on for all of them.

We ordered a skip to help with clearing the bungalow. Laura and I spent tuesday going through stuff while we waited for the NHR to come collect the hospital bed, but found very little of use or value sentimentally or monitary so I think most of it is going to end up in landfill. Some will go to charity, her clothes already have, and the scrap man took quite a bit of metal away with him but there is still going to be lots of stuff. A different generation who kept anything and everything in case it came in useful.

Yet again nothing is ever straightforward for us though and the skip people never arrived. When Martin phoned up to find out what had happened at first the guy answering the phone told him it had already been delivered .. err I think we would have spotted a 6 yard skip sitting outside. But it turns out the driver in charge the day before had crossed out the wrong days work as having been completed, and of course that was our day. They send a skip round soon after that but too late for us to get started on the big clear out job.

 The usual list of calamities are occuring all round, Kelly developed an ulser on her eye, tres painful and requiring drops at 1 hour intervals and lots of hospital visits. She went yesterday and was told that it is slowly healing but she will be left with scaring. In the meantime, I managed to drop a large metal pole on my foot ending up in deep bruising. And the potsy dog we have inherited continues to use my carpets instead of the lawn if he thinks it is too cold to go outside to squat!

New Year and Christmas

As I grow older I am finding it increasingly difficult to remember all of lifes details as they happen to me and mine. Of course a lot of this might be because what with covid lockdowns and a reluctance to actually go do stuff when we are out of lockdown (how many of us have simply got out of the habit of going out doing stuff) there are no details to recall, life just blends into one?

Whatever, even though I dont usually bother with all that new year stuff including resolutions, I have decided I need to open up a new bullet journal and throw some stuff at this blog.

The details for the start of this year arent that brilliant to be remembering though. Yesterday I started the new year with tooth ache. This is on a tooth the dentist took several hours building a half crown on, so I am a tad worried as it covers one of my back chewing teeth. I am hoping its a gum thing and not a tooth thing.

Then I also spent some time  yesterday writing out death announcements to send to all the people who knew my mum that I have not phoned (as many of them I simply dont know} and then some time this morning finding layouts with her in to take to the funeral and wake (I did this for my dad, it seemed I scrapped him a great deal more than mum who hated having her photo taken}.

We took the christmas decorations down yesterday, a bit early as I usually do it on 12th night but with the funeral leaving from our place the day after I thought I may need some time to get them down and clean the house.

Anyway enough of the negative lets do the positive.

Christmas (despite mum not being with us) actually turned out to be really good this year. Kelly and Ollie were spending the day at Ollies sisters so they both popped in to us to open presents before they went there. From them I got a Bothy cross stitch kit and Johanna Basfords Worlds of Wonder book.  They left at 5 to 10 and then we went to Laura and Waynes where we were spending the day and the night. We had a relaxed time just the six of us sitting round opening our gifts from each other, again I did well, another Bothy cross stitch (not the same one), a set of knitting needles and accessories, a bullet journal and a set of stencils, some circle stitched stamps, nail stickers, and the christmas logo game. But by the far the best part of the morning/day/year was when Finley opened his present. He had been promised a PS5 for his efforts in the  Kent Test but getting hold of one had prooved near impossible so he had accepted the fact it was not going to happen,. His reaction when he opened his last christmas present from his  mum and dad reduced all of us to tears, Laura had secretly managed to get one when she was off sick. Finley sat and started at it, held his head and then silently tears of astounded joy and surprised welled up and fell down his face. Priceless!

 

Later Waynes parents joined us for a fun christmas lunch. Laura had got silly face maskes to start the entertainment, the obligatory crackers, a silly parce the santa, 

 

lots of forfiets and lots of laughs with a very tasty lunch. 

 

Of course the disasters which make our christmases struck as usual, this time the microwave deciding to pack up half way through warming our christmas pud!

 

After lunch we exchanged pressies with Di and Gra then I was treated to a lesson from Laura in making tea and coffee for all (LOL)

Unfortunatly all the excitement prooved a little too much for Graham and they had to cut their day short but as they left Waynes brother wife and daughter arrived so the boys and Chloe spent some time playing with the NURF guns the boys had had for christmas, or reindeer toss, which had us all giggling. We also got the kids doing tongue twisters which resulting in Beckett coming out with a rude word when he attempted peter pipper picked, and Craig nearly having heart failure from laughing.

 More food as Laura layed up the tradition cold meat salad and  pickle tea, and then everyone left. We had a game of reindeer stack which again left us in hysterics. 

 

By this time it was getting on for ten and although not that late for christmas day everyone had either had early mornings or broken nights sleep so it was off to bed with no board games. Yet it had been fun, we had laughed, eaten drunk and shared it all with family. What more did we need? 

We needed more of the same, so in the morning we went home, tidied up, baked a ham and welcomed Laura Wayne and the boys back to ours for late tea and board games until late, when we tucked them up in our spare beds, tired but feeling all warm and fuzzy having had time together- a fantastic improvement on our lockdown zoom christmas of the year before.